At the request of Get Up! I’ve sent in my job application, one of the 40 per month that Senator Abetz requires. I’m working on the other 39 distinct applications, but I can tell you now, all of them will be to his office.

Dear Senator Abetz,

I wish to apply for employment in your office as a Policy Advisor. I believe I could bring a wealth of experience to the position, and with a lifetime’s life experience and a tonne of common sense, I believe I could do at least as well, and probably better, than your current staff. Let’s face it, I’m way overqualified.

I’m 67 but I’m willing to lie about my age. I’m in poor health but that won’t matter to you, will it? After all, you won’t care.

I was an electronics technician all my life so I’m very used to dealing with complex ideas. That will almost certainly make me overqualified for a job with you as you only deal in simplistic concepts However, I’ll try to reduce myself to your level. I’ll never get down there, but I’m a trier.

I’m willing to work for low pay since you believe everyone below your position should work for next to nothing. I’ll buy that. Actually, I won’t be able to afford to, but I’ll throw myself on your mercy. Heh heh.

I’ll await your immediate reply. After all, you do very little, so you will have plenty of time to treat my application very, very seriously.

Yours in eager anticipation,
Peter Croft
Butler, WA