Minnie dog

Minnie dog
Minnie is starting to worry me just a little. She seems fine, although the tumour near her right hip is protruding a lot now. Yet she lies on it. That says to me it doesn’t hurt.
But she’s slow to take her food now. She still eats it all, but she won’t take a piece of meaty bone from my hand. I have to drop it. She thinks about it, then picks it up a few seconds later. She even leaves a bit sometimes.
I’m slowly reducing the amount I feed her. Sometimes she doesn’t even come to the door looking for her dinner, so I don’t chase her.
But last night I went to bed late, about 1am. It was cold and had started to rain. I looked out the front and she wasn’t there under the verandah. She wasn’t out the back either. I didn’t want to go out in the rain so I shouted for her to come in. No response.
I started to worry a bit. I’ve been leaving the front gate open – she ain’t going anywhere. But she was nowhere to be seen. I shouted and cajoled. Nothing. Had she wandered off? Surely not?
Finally, I went out in the rain and round the side near the lounge room chimney. I know she likes to lie there, and there she was, in a sand depression, even though she was getting wet.

This time she got up when I called her and came in to the front, still outside but at least she was dry now. I tried to get her to come inside, but she won’t. No matter how cold, she wants to sleep outside.

Amazing

On the right track at last   Perth city station 2011
Wow, this is amazing. Hi Rach. Thanks very much for your support. How great that the web and computers have allowed us to be in contact like this. (Btw: I’m especially proud of 1 July, entitled One Kooka, Two Kookas, Three Kookas etc. I hope you enjoy it.)
For my other readers, this morning I followed a WordPress link and got into a fantastic conversation about 10 Things That Suck About Being a Guy. One thing led to another and I started revealing perhaps a little more than I intended about how I feel about being a guy.
My post attracted some very nice replies and so I’ve posted a link to this blog, where I’ve dropped some hints about how much better I’ve been feeling lately. I still can’t reveal exactly what it is, but let’s say it’s a natural remedy. 
I wish, I wish, I wish I’d done it 9 years ago when it was first suggested, but I was too scared then. The result is, I lost almost an entire decade of my life to depression, fatigue, loss of drive, loss of motivation, weight gain, suicidal thoughts, tiredness, and generally being angry and crapped off. 
Grumpy old man syndrome! It’s true! I know I’m hard to get along with, but I’ve been through a meat grinder. It has been hard going, very hard.
I’ve kept diaries luckily and now I’m documenting it all. If only I’d followed my own instincts instead of listening to doctors. False diagnosis after false diagnosis.
Mind you, sleep apnea from the early 1990s nearly killed me. Heart disease, diabetes, weight gain, depression, constant, constant fatigue were caused by it and took their toll.
Starting with the CPAP machine in July 2000 fixed me for a few months. It was a revelation.
But it didn’t last! My fatigue and loss of drive and general crapped off feeling returned. It wasn’t the sleep problem any more, I was sleeping well, but I was also having to sleep during the day, every day.
This has continued right through the past decade from 2000 to 2012. It’s all in my diaries and I’m now writing it out in a time line.
I won’t be posting it here – it’s too personal and too long, but you get the idea.
All I need say is that my mind is now clear and I’m getting on with the remainder of my life. I only hope I’ve got enough time left.
PS: I’m also developing another blog about CDs, with pictures. I’m totally restricting access at the moment until it’s ready. More anon. (It will be in WordPress, too, not this stupid bug ridden Blogger!)